My first memory is of the
crucifix in my boyhood parish, Holy Name in Birmingham, Michigan. I do not know how old I was, but I knew Jesus
had died for me and my whole life was suppose to be a
response to this. This is certainly not a typical first memory but my family was anything but typical. My father, John, was the Chief Executive Officer and Chairman of the Board for the Chrysler Corporation, and also a devout Catholic.
crucifix in my boyhood parish, Holy Name in Birmingham, Michigan. I do not know how old I was, but I knew Jesus
had died for me and my whole life was suppose to be a
response to this. This is certainly not a typical first memory but my family was anything but typical. My father, John, was the Chief Executive Officer and Chairman of the Board for the Chrysler Corporation, and also a devout Catholic.
My father proved that religion
was not just a crutch for the weak.
Every night he was on his knees before he went to bed, and even during
his frequent travels he went to daily Mass.
My mother, Thelma, was initially a Methodist, but she accompanied us to
Mass long before her eventual conversion to the Catholic faith.
I was the youngest of five
children and my very existence occurred against the
advice of my mother’s doctor, because of her painful and crippling back
condition. My mom later told me that I
was a gift to her and my father, and in turn, they gave me back to God.
children and my very existence occurred against the
advice of my mother’s doctor, because of her painful and crippling back
condition. My mom later told me that I
was a gift to her and my father, and in turn, they gave me back to God.
During my childhood, my prayers centered around my mother’s bad
back. Endless treatments failed to alleviate her constant pain. When I was thirteen, one of my sisters called
our mother to tell her she had just come from a charismatic prayer meeting and
someone had sensed that God wanted to cure someone with a bad back. My
sister was convinced it would be our mother.
back. Endless treatments failed to alleviate her constant pain. When I was thirteen, one of my sisters called
our mother to tell her she had just come from a charismatic prayer meeting and
someone had sensed that God wanted to cure someone with a bad back. My
sister was convinced it would be our mother.
Within a month, mom was playing tennis–completely
healed–although there was no medical reason for the pain to be gone. Two years later, she formally converted to
the Catholic faith.
healed–although there was no medical reason for the pain to be gone. Two years later, she formally converted to
the Catholic faith.
Growing up in this home of
prayer and miracles gave me a strong anchor.
Yet, ironically, as a teenager, I began to hide my faith. I never stopped praying, but I began to live
a life as one leading to hell. I no longer went to confession and by the time
I attended college at University of Michigan in Ann Arbor, my attendance at
Mass was sporadic. It wasn’t enjoyable
to hear the Gospel when I was not living a holy life.
prayer and miracles gave me a strong anchor.
Yet, ironically, as a teenager, I began to hide my faith. I never stopped praying, but I began to live
a life as one leading to hell. I no longer went to confession and by the time
I attended college at University of Michigan in Ann Arbor, my attendance at
Mass was sporadic. It wasn’t enjoyable
to hear the Gospel when I was not living a holy life.
Not until my junior year in college, in 1986, did my life change. I began connecting with a group of young men for basketball games who were part of an ecumenical Christian brotherhood outreach group. I saw men my own age who were normal guys but really knew God and were not afraid to talk
about it. I began to examine my life and went through a conversion. At this time, I broke off a serious romantic, leaving me free
to concentrate on Christian outreach to university students.
about it. I began to examine my life and went through a conversion. At this time, I broke off a serious romantic, leaving me free
to concentrate on Christian outreach to university students.
Upon graduation, armed with
a degree in English and communications, I interviewed for jobs in the
automotive industry. It soon became clear to me that this was not the
life God intended for me. So while
trying to find his niche in the world, I accepted a job baking bread. With great trepidation, I drove home to tell
my father of my plans to bake bread. I
thought my dad would be disappointed.
Instead, he told me he would be thrilled with whatever I chose to do in
life
a degree in English and communications, I interviewed for jobs in the
automotive industry. It soon became clear to me that this was not the
life God intended for me. So while
trying to find his niche in the world, I accepted a job baking bread. With great trepidation, I drove home to tell
my father of my plans to bake bread. I
thought my dad would be disappointed.
Instead, he told me he would be thrilled with whatever I chose to do in
life
even if I wanted to be a priest. I assured him that would never happen.
Driving back to Ann Arbor
that day, tears streamed down my face as I felt my life was moving beyond my
own control. I wanted to follow Jesus, but as yet, I was unclear where that
led. What I was suddenly clear on,
however, was that following Jesus was
not romantic; that the cross is heavy.
I realized I was not the one in control.
that day, tears streamed down my face as I felt my life was moving beyond my
own control. I wanted to follow Jesus, but as yet, I was unclear where that
led. What I was suddenly clear on,
however, was that following Jesus was
not romantic; that the cross is heavy.
I realized I was not the one in control.
As I cried, the words to a
Christian song, “God’s Own Fool” played
on my car stereo. “…So come lose your
life for a carpenter’s son, for a madman who died for a dream. And you’ll have the faith His first followers
had and you’ll feel the weight of the beam.”
Christian song, “God’s Own Fool” played
on my car stereo. “…So come lose your
life for a carpenter’s son, for a madman who died for a dream. And you’ll have the faith His first followers
had and you’ll feel the weight of the beam.”
At that very moment, I had an actual vision of our Lord in my
car. He sat next to me. It was clear that it was Him. I was still crying. He reached across the seat and dug his right
hand into my chest and said, “John these are all your dreams, goals and desires
and everything you want to do with your life.” He withdrew His hand and pulled everything out and motioned throwing it
all out the window.
car. He sat next to me. It was clear that it was Him. I was still crying. He reached across the seat and dug his right
hand into my chest and said, “John these are all your dreams, goals and desires
and everything you want to do with your life.” He withdrew His hand and pulled everything out and motioned throwing it
all out the window.
I said, “Lord,
that’s my life you just threw out the window.” Jesus then said, “John, I’m going to give you my dream, my goal, my
desire and what I want you to do with your life.” And then He was gone. I felt panicked. This was so
personal. Still, I did not know what God
had planned for me. For the next three
years, I did Christian outreach with university students. For a time I
seriously considered joining a Christian brotherhood of non-denominational men,
but ultimately decided it was not for me.
that’s my life you just threw out the window.” Jesus then said, “John, I’m going to give you my dream, my goal, my
desire and what I want you to do with your life.” And then He was gone. I felt panicked. This was so
personal. Still, I did not know what God
had planned for me. For the next three
years, I did Christian outreach with university students. For a time I
seriously considered joining a Christian brotherhood of non-denominational men,
but ultimately decided it was not for me.
By the time I was twenty-five, I took a job working in Ohio for Ford Motor Company in an account management training program. I was dating again and had decided to apply to graduate school. During this time, while reading his Bible one day, I came across this passage in Matthew: “Some are incapable of marriage because they were born so; some, because they were made so by others; some, because they have renounced marriage for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Whoever can accept this ought to accept it.
Something stirred within me.
I thought, “Oh nuts! I think I’m suppose to do this.” I almost threw my Bible on the ground. In frustration, I cried out to God, “Lord, I don’t get it.
I thought of marriage once, that didn’t fit; the brotherhood didn’t fit,
I started dating again, that didn’t fit…”
I thought, “Oh nuts! I think I’m suppose to do this.” I almost threw my Bible on the ground. In frustration, I cried out to God, “Lord, I don’t get it.
I thought of marriage once, that didn’t fit; the brotherhood didn’t fit,
I started dating again, that didn’t fit…”
Suddenly, I heard a clear
voice speaking to me: “John, I’m
inviting you to live single and to do it as a priest.” Although the voice would not have been
audible to another, it was certainly not my own voice–I had never even
considered the priesthood.
voice speaking to me: “John, I’m
inviting you to live single and to do it as a priest.” Although the voice would not have been
audible to another, it was certainly not my own voice–I had never even
considered the priesthood.
I responded, “Lord, if
that’s what you want me to do, then you better give me a desire for it, because
I don’t have it.” By the fifth day, I longed to know more
about the priesthood.
that’s what you want me to do, then you better give me a desire for it, because
I don’t have it.” By the fifth day, I longed to know more
about the priesthood.
It was late December in
1990 when I contacted the vocation director of Sacred Heart Major seminary in
Detroit. I had to wait until the next
school year to be admitted, but in the meantime I could take a few
classes. As I walked into the building
for the first time, a wave of peace washed over me. I thought, “I’m finally home.” I knew on my end, with full clarity, that
this was what God was calling me to. This was why I was made, which is an
amazing thing to grasp.
1990 when I contacted the vocation director of Sacred Heart Major seminary in
Detroit. I had to wait until the next
school year to be admitted, but in the meantime I could take a few
classes. As I walked into the building
for the first time, a wave of peace washed over me. I thought, “I’m finally home.” I knew on my end, with full clarity, that
this was what God was calling me to. This was why I was made, which is an
amazing thing to grasp.
After a year-and-a-half at
Sacred Heart Seminary, I was asked to go to
finish my theological studies in Rome.
Before final admission to the North American College, I needed a
physical. Although in excellent physical
condition and only twenty-six, testing
indicated possible heart irregularities.
A stress test was scheduled.
After studying the results, the cardiologist questioned me about any
severe childhood illnesses I may have had.
There had been high fevers and seizures but nothing more.
Sacred Heart Seminary, I was asked to go to
finish my theological studies in Rome.
Before final admission to the North American College, I needed a
physical. Although in excellent physical
condition and only twenty-six, testing
indicated possible heart irregularities.
A stress test was scheduled.
After studying the results, the cardiologist questioned me about any
severe childhood illnesses I may have had.
There had been high fevers and seizures but nothing more.
“No, that couldn’t have
done it,” the doctor determined. He told me that I had unexplainable scar
tissue on my heart. The prognosis was
that it was nothing to be concerned about but it could occasionally cause shortness
of breath.
done it,” the doctor determined. He told me that I had unexplainable scar
tissue on my heart. The prognosis was
that it was nothing to be concerned about but it could occasionally cause shortness
of breath.
I had been in Rome for a month when I was in chapel one day meditating on the three pivotal moments in my life: my first memory of the crucifix, the vision in the car, and the invitation to be a priest. Itwas at that moment when it became clear
to me, where the scar tissue on my heart had come from. I felt like God told
me, “The scar tissue is from my hand.”
Often, during the Mass, at the moment of consecration, when I lift the bread and wine and it becomes the Body and Blood of Our Lord Jesus Christ, I often lose my breath and feel as if my heart is being squeezed. It is a reminder to me of the day God barged into his life, and brought me to the joy of the priesthood.
| Fr. John Fr. John Riccardo was ordained a priest of the Archdiocese of Detroit in 1996. He is now pastor at Our Lady of Good Counsel in Plymouth, MI and hosts the program “Christ is the Answer” on Ave Maria Radio on Wednesday’s at 8 p.m. It is a catechical program of parish and Theology on Tap teachings. Fr. John is an expert on JPII’s Theology of the Body. This story was part of the collection: Amazing Grace for the Catholic Heart. |
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I grew up a sick kid with a serious kidney problem and at about eight years old I asked my mother why, "God let me be sick all the time". She told her child in a simple answer that, "sometimes God gives these kinds of things to special people so they can be closer to Him in heaven". It was a good answer and satisfied me for many years.
I went to high school and college and talked myself into and out of priesthood for many years. Finally, I told myself that I could either wonder for the rest of my life if I should have gone to the seminary, which I thought would be a stupid thing to do, or I could go and find out. It was a win, win situation as far as I could see.
I drove my entrance application down to the seminary. Everyone was in class so I walked around and admired the truly beautiful grounds, but was uninspired. When class let out, it was time for Mass and it was during the celebration of the Eucharist that God penetrated my heart in a powerful way, and I thought to myself, "I have to come back!" From that point on I was focused on coming back to that place, which I would later discover, was for me the only place on earth I wanted to be.
I have now been ordained for nine-teen years and in the past two, I have had to deal with epilepsy. It is a new condition for me but has been an opportunity to grace as well as a cross, as some of the first medications had horrific side effects which challenged me to celebrate the Sacraments, particularly during Advent and Christmas, when I was suffering so profoundly, especially since the seizures happened almost exclusively during Mass, most especially at the Holy Consecration. If Fr.John Riccardo had scar tissue on his heart from Jesus reaching in, I will add, that the cross is part of the life of every priest. Like the call to priesthood, we can either say, "Yes Lord, your will be done", or we can say, "Lord, why me". For all who read this, pray. You have your cross, we have ours. I give thanks to God for the witness to faith that Fr. John Riccardo has offered here and pray that others who have heard God speak to them, not be afraid, but answer, Lord reach into my life and my heart so that not my will, but only your will be done. Blessings, Fr. John Gracey
Thank you Fr. Gracey for sharing your inspirational life story. What an example. We give thanks to all those who have given their lives to serve God as one of his holy priests. You are serving us too in such a divine way! God bless you!
Thank y'all, Fathers, for sharing your stories. I appreciate very much for sharing about your relationship and vocations. As an ordinary Catholic, I always need to be reminded that priests are human and need support. It helps make the faith come alive. Thank you.